Sunday, April 10, 2011

Dating -writing an online profile.


Well I've been off doing some research and it seems the whole online dating thing has lost a lot of it's stigma. Back in the day you'd often see lines like 'can we lie about how we met?' on peoples profiles but no more...on-line dating is now cool, trendy and the place to meet people. As my friend Tess put it "after a few glasses of wine you're not safe to drive...and after seeing some of the guys I've pulled when out I'm not safe to do that either. At least with online dating you get to vet them first and work out if they're nuts while you're sober."

This weeks post are all about online dating - writing that killer profile, picking the best pictures, grabbing people's attention with a great headline...and generally marketing yourself to the best of your ability.

Most dating websites follow the standard
You register with an email address, supply your vital measurements, pick a username, add a tag line, maybe some photo's and finally you get to write a little bit out yourself.

Now often the little personal bio comes all the way at the end and is often at the point where you're losing the will to live and debating if this was such a great idea in the first place. However I'd argue that this is the part you need to consider first and put most effort into.

Here's my rational... Online dating is very much like marketing. You are the product and the people you are hoping to meet and date are your customers. The best selling products in life go beyond just the thing you buy they have a brand - and brands are powerful things. When it comes to your dating profile it is your first chance to make an impression and start building that brand. The personal bio you write is your chance to sell that winning personality and show how witty, charming and down right funny you can be.
For us blokes, we tend to be visual creatures and so just flick through hundreds of pictures until we find the girl we like. Women on the other hand are far more discerning and what is written on your profile will be what  they judge you on - so make it count.

Just a side note - yes this is a generalisation and if you look like Brad Pitt or Christian Bale then no you don't have to have that much of a write-up....but then why would you be reading this if you were (-;

Back to the write up.
Before you go anywhere near registering on one of these sites take some time to plan you brand.
Get some paper and a pen, find a quiet comfortable place and do a little brainstorming.
Note down all the things you like doing - hobbies, interests, work, family, holidays
Next jot a few aspirations you have for the future...
...and finally what are you looking for in a date and where would that date be?

Ok - now circle three to five things that you think are the most interesting or engaging.
These are going to be the focus of your bio.

So lets get down to writing it...

The C's of good communication
When writing anything I always keep in mind the 7 C's of communication. It's a little on the management bull side of things but there are some good principals that are worth keeping in mind....

The 7 C's are:-
  • COMPLETE - take time to write a few paragraphs in your bio
  • COURTEOUS - this seems obvious but avoid any topics or views that might be easily misinterpreted 
  • CONSIDERATE - always thing of the person you are trying to attract while writing your bio
  • CLEAR - avoid text speak or slang, and just write in an easy to understand manner cutting out any jargon.
  • CONCISE - this isn't the time for florid prose, keep it short and sweet - this is to get you chatting nothing more.
  • CONCRETE - mmmmm yeah forget this one
  • CORRECT - keep what you write honest - it's easy to re-invent yourself online and be something you're not. If you're serious about meeting people then keep it real. 
Now not all of these apply to writing a dating profile but they are handy to consider.

Finally to help you write that killer profile here is a structure to follow that might make things a bit easier...
  1. Witty opening - humour is one of the best ways to start a hook them with a catchy line. 
  2. About you - pick off a few of the things from the brainstorming excersise that make you unique. Don't go into too much detail or you'll have nothing to talk about on the first date.
  3. Your aspirations -  Add a few sentances about where you see your life going which helps build the impression that you are someone who knows what they want and have direction
  4. ...maybe fit a joke - again humour always seems to work
  5. What you're looking for - Both in terms of the person you're looking to attract and what the first date might be.
So there you have my quick and dirty guide to writing a dating profile...part 1



  1. I've never checked out dating sites. Maybe when i'm 40 and single aha

  2. dont really feel the need to date onlinem useful in general though

  3. Haha! This is well-written! I'll be reading more.

  4. i think its sad this is becoming the norm, but good advice

  5. Online dating still seems desperate to me but what do I know....

  6. I am already taken but good tips all the same!

  7. Years ago, I admit, I was one of those who thought online dating was ridiculous. But after wisening up, I can see how it would be pretty useful, what with how all social networking seems to be going online now. If I were in the position, I'd think about it.

    ... Not craigslist, though. Don't do that.

  8. wow, you have give it much though, very insight info, waiting for part 2.

  9. Online dating isn't really my kind of thing. Seems so distant, socially awkward.

  10. Online dating seems just kinda weird to me. I dunno it just seems kinda fake.

  11. Great advice. Too many people are turned off by the fakes online.

  12. So much easier if you're female, all you need is a good profile picture....

  13. Im not really into online dating but your tips are essential to all those single online daters wondering what they are doing wrong!

  14. I find my women on craigslist


  15. I always thought just going out somewhere and doing something is the best way

  16. Great post. Like anything in life, you have to put your best face forward :0)

  17. Nice blog bro! fallow

  18. I'm not a big online dater but I bet this could be useful if I ever need it!